THANKS: An Inspiration and an Unmitigated Success

Dear loyal POOG readers, I don't usually follow one post so quickly with another, but your response to and support of Silks for Success has been staggering. My favorite donation was a threadbare pare of parachute pants from the 80s. You could practically hear Duran Duran as we cut the swatches in the office.

In fact, one diehard reader (and constant source of inspiration) bravely and kindly shared a childhood story that has sparked an entirely new initiative. Her fond memories of "a fleet of very small people who made me wonderful sets of underwear in every color" (some of which she donated to our Vintage Silks collection) are the catalyst for the evolution of Silks for Success, which we are renaming Undies for the Underprivileged (AKA Panties for the Poor). By refining our collection efforts and focusing on this niche we feel that the organisation will be infinitely more successful. Thank you all again!

GET: Everyone Should Sleep in Silk at Least Once

The world would be a better place. That's just the truth. All silk is not created equal, (I realized this when I was nine and my godmother, Carolina H., proved it to me at lunch one day in a cute little bodega in a lovely upper class neighborhood in Lima) but any silk will do, really. Given all of the harshness in the world today, the hard edges of reality, the angularity of moving through time, I think it would be good for everyone to consider how to get even a tiny square of silk for just a quick snuggle. To that effect, I'd like to announce the launch of a new foundation - Silks for Success. We will gather unwanted swatches of silk from manufacturers world wide and redistibute them to as many people as humanly possible in an environmentally correct way. We think that dropping squares of silk from well-marked and decorated hot air balloons would serve the triple purpose of leaving virtually no carbon footprint, getting our heartfelt softness-for-everone message out and providing the tools for everyone to participate (by dropping the silks out of the basket to the earth below.) If you are interested in donating any silk that you have left over from gowns, undergarments, furnishings, please send them to Silks for Success, Capitol Hill Celebrity Efforts, 201 4th Street, SE, Washington, DC 20003. Please use only recyclable materials in your package. The whole good team is just thrilled!

MAKE: A Simple Delight

Remember lemonade stands? The delight of a carefree, breezy spring or summer afternoon spent on the sidewalk selling too-sweet lemonade to hot passersby. Well, times have changed and my children's cherished memories will include not lemonade, but water. That's right. They had a fantastically successful Water Stand on Saturday and raised more than $400 for a budding entrepreneur in an anciently third world country. A prouder mother you will never find. I just have to boast. My oldest daughter, dancing in and out of the house in her ragged old Mustique sweatshirt, was the vision of a smart, driven business woman in the making. It was her idea to change the sign from one that said WATER to one that read Water for Starving Thirdworld People of Color, "the difference between sales and marketing, Mom, duh!" So sweet. It was my son's idea to package the water with blueberry-filled ice cubes (at a premium of $4.75 a cup). What a dynamic duo, if I do say so myself. If your kids would like to chair a similar water sale here is a list of ingredients:

Water

Good luck!

GET: My New Driving Shoes

Everyone SHOULD have these! They have revolutionized my life, my wardrobe, my friendships, my driving. I don't know how I survived without them. And no, I don't have a multimillion dollar contract with the fine italian leather shoe purveyor of these shoes. I JUST LIKE THEM. They come in every color and my good friend Stacey swears that she wears them to bed. I am not sure what her husband thinks about this, but maybe it works for them. My daughters Parsely and Sage have little mini versions of mine and it is SOOO cute. They cost about $468.00 for the kids and an adult pair is just under $800, but it is SO WORTH it. I've found that I actually SAVE money with these shoes since I use them to DRIVE and WALK in . Who knew!

BE: Thoughts on Anger

Hi, I thought it would be interesting to ask a few people who know nothing in particular about the subject what their thoughts are on anger management. Some people believe that asking experts, you know - critical thinkers and people knowledgable about a topic - is actually a better path to take. But, I disagree. I think that asking people who are potentially complete idiots - you know, who know nothing specific about a topic - might yield a broader spectrum of answers and hence perhaps come closer to the truth ultimately, statistically speaking. So, I have asked Maggie Fife, a nail technician; Peter Mallory, a financial analyst formerly employed by Goldman Sachs and Leslie Nguke, a windsurfer from Malawi what their thoughts on Anger Management are. Here are their thoughts. Be happy!

Maggie Fife replies:
Gee. I don't know. Maybe a manicure would help. You know, you can listen to nature sounds while you have your hands done.

Peter Mallory replies:
Are you joking? Haven't you figured this out yet yourself? What? What? I don't see what the big deal is about managing anger. EVERYONE gets angry. You just need to find the right person to yell at. That's the key to success. There is ALWAYS someone to yell at. That's what makes a good manger - knowing who to yell at. I mean, really.

Leslie Nguke
Dude. Peace out.

DO: How To Part Your Hair Like a Supermodel

There are bad hair days and BAD HAIR DAYS. You all know what I am talking about. Well, Henry J. at Studios Max in New York is an expert on all things sebaceous and he is also one of the world's true gems in general. This weekend, he shared an invaluable tip with me on a day when I thought my hair was just going to make me sob or beat my children. It was so simple, so quick and so effective that I thought I would pass it on.

Six Simple Stops to Parting Your Hair by Henry J.

Step 1 : Buy a good comb. Narsicca makes the best one. It costs less than $50.00 and can fit into your pocket when folded. The key is to make sure that your comb has a very pointy tip. Some people think that using a sharpened 3 cent pencil works the same way - but don't be fooled. It doesn't.

Step 2: Find a well-lit mirror and look at yourself face on. Remember - we are all beautiful inside and flaws are not your problem. If someone else looks at you and finds flaws, that's their problem. A mirror is your friend and should be treated as such. If your lighting is not good then find another mirror. In order to achieve a good part you need to make sure that there are absolutely no shadows on your head or face. Stop now and check for shadows.

Step 3: Raise the pointed end of your Narsicca comb and place it on the tip of your nose. Counting to 17 slowly raise the top to your hairline. If you reach your hairline before reaching 17 start over. Counting to 17 may seem silly, but it 17 is a spiritual prime number of great significance. If you reach your hairline on the exact count of 17 you will achieve superior results.

Step 4: Once you have reached your hairline take three deep breaths, close your eyes and let the comb take over as you push it back along your scalp. When you have reached half way along the crest of your skull, stop. It is at now time to look at your handiwork.

Step 5: Take a piece of 18" tooth floss and bite one end in your mouth. Raise the floss up and over your head and line it up with the part. Pull the floss into the part you have created and pull it up and over to your nape. Tape the floss to the back of your neck and complete your part by pulling the comb to the point at which the tape meets your hairline.

Step 6: Remove the tape. Smile.

Parting your hair in this way should take no more than 12 minutes. It's a little more than usual, but wait till you see the results. Once you've achieved this part you can do almost anything.

BE: Mommy and Me Tweener Classes

I realized early this dewy morning that the days of Mommy and Me ballet classes are gone forever. Filled will longing for the easy, mindless hours of non-confrontational twirling and tutus I came up with a new idea: Mommy and Me Sex Ed! Why not continue the tradition, taking valuable lessons we've learned and pass on practical information to our girls in a fun way!

The lessons that came to mind immediately are the ones we all know, but that are sometimes hard to follow through on:
1) Set by example (which I take to mean a grown up version of "Show and Tell")
2) Communicate clearly and frequently

When you combine these two, a weekly sex ed class that you can share with your tween daughter becomes as easy as getting a full body wax.

Not one to sit on an idea for long, I immediately called Janice Nessorini at Bantam Books (if you don't know her you should, here's her number, 212-879-8890) and she is putting together a preliminary curriculum, book proposal and short documentary film for schools. Since this is not really my field of expertise (having only had sex, but not taught it to my daughter in any detailed fashion) I made a few topic suggestions that I hope she incorporates, ranging from how NOT to tell a boy NO and 5 easy steps to latex free orgasms. I hope you can join us! Schedule to follow.

DO: Socks for SOCCS

As you may know, I sit on the board of an organisation called SOCCS (Sisters of Owners of Canine Cancer Survivors). It is a wonderful organisation, dedicated to a little known group of women who are sisters of owners of canine cancer suvivors. Resources for these women are limited, to say the least. In addition to providing financial assistance, SOCCS works closely to meet these women's day to day emotional and social needs through a series of seminars, mentors, cocktail parties and hot stone therapy.

Our upcoming event was my very own brainchild: SOCKS for SOCCS. We will be auctioning socks donated by authentically stellar people (you know, stars). Although your socks are probably lovely, realistically they won't raise much money unless you can demonstrate that they've been worn by someone with a high twitter ranking (but thanks anyway). My friend, M (#2 on Twitter last week), has donated the pair pictured here, which have the added benefit of having been peed on, in a demonstration of territoriality or incontinence (we're not sure, but who really cares) by her very own sister's cancer suviving pooch Fred (isn't he adorable). The auction details are below:

Date: May 16, 2009

Place: DivaDogs Nightclub

Time: 9:00pm

Online Auction: http://www.soccs.org/

Please join us!